What is high conflict parenting?
In Ontario, high-conflict parenting is marked with the parents’ inability to effectively communicate with each other regarding parenting-related issues. In some cases, such communication is hostile and negative, sometimes coupled with verbal or physical aggression. In other cases, there is little communication because one or both parents simply refuse to talk.
Either way, the parties end up overly rely on the judge for minor or major decisions, which is not only inefficient, it is bad for the children: it increases the chance of family violence, police involvement, hurtful allegations in and out of the court, and ultimately it is the children’s best interests that will suffer as a result.
Parenting coordination
Parenting coordination is one way to resolve high conflict disputes in a parenting context. It is a structured arrangement where both parents make decisions with a qualified parenting coordinator. The parenting coordinator coaches the parents to work together but can often make decisions for them when they are unable to.
Parenting coordinators are appointed through consent order, separation agreement, arbitration award or parenting coordination contract.
Parenting coordinators educate parents about their children’s needs and the impact of parental conflict on their children’s development. They provide parents with tools that minimize and contain the conflict between them. They can also assist parents with their exchange of information about the children’s health, education, religious or spiritual training, schedules, routines and needs.
The parenting coordinator may meet with the children — and the parents — together or individually, facilitate discussions between the parents through mediation, assess the family dynamic — including power imbalances — and the needs of each parent and the children.
Some of the issues that are typically addressed by a parenting coordinator are:
- parenting schedule,
- supervision of parenting,
- arrange transition in children’s care,
- parental conduct,
- parental attendance at school etc.,
- children’s travel,
- Movement of the children’s belongings between home.
The parenting coordinator has the authority to require the parents or children to attend therapy or counselling, or a parent to participate in substance abuse testing.
A parenting coordinator has NO AUTHORITY to change legal custody, primary residence, permanently change parenting schedule unless the changes are minor and contemplated in agreements or court orders.
If you are facing a high-conflict parenting dispute and would like know more about parenting coordination, you need to contact a lawyer to set it up. Talk to us today and see how we can help you.